Roll Call Tribute

(Published in) Portland (OR) Tribune (on) April 7, 2015

Thomas N. Holder

Created on Tuesday, 07 April 2015 12:05 | Written by The Review

October 5, 1947 to April 2, 2015

So many things could be said of Thomas N. Holder of Lake Oswego, OR, suddenly stricken by cancer at the age of 67. However, a few things are worth noting in his remembrance.

First, Tom was a gentleman by upbringing, with an intelligent, fair and gracious nature. His mother impressed upon him a Southern gentility, warm sense of humor and good manners – all of which made him “really good with old ladies,” and tempered his passion when voicing opinions on local civic and education issues.

Devotion to his family and Becky, his wife of 45 years, was the second pillar of Tom’s life. Few peas in a pod were less likely than petite Becky and towering Tom. But from a poolside meeting between the handsome lifeguard home from college and the teen ingénue, Tom was inseparable from his lifelong muse. Through countless good times and a few deeply tragic ones, Tom was by Becky’s side. He deeply loved being a father to Luke, and later to Rin, who became a daughter not only in spirit, but in name.

Volunteering and citizenship were a third distinguishing aspect of Tom’s life, especially his investment of time and resources to math and technology initiatives at Lake Oswego schools. He also volunteered for Respite Care.

Last, Tom had re-awakened his spiritual life. As with most things Tom did, he was all-in. He began finding his spiritual path with daily commitments to meditation, yoga and the Sunrise at the Firehouse AA group. Recently Tom renewed his sacraments in the Catholic Church. Faith had taken on greater meaning for Tom, and in his last days, provided unfathomable comfort.

Tom Holder was born in Houston, Texas to J.A. and Lorene Nelson Holder. An outstanding student and swimmer, he was awarded a scholarship to the Texas A & M, where he earned bachelor’s degrees in math and electrical engineering, and a master’s in computer science. He served in ROTC and U.S. Army National Guard, training as a paratrooper.

In 1969 Tom and Becky married, and set out to bring their passion for Texas cooking and low- down Texas country music to San Francisco, where they lived for 18 years, first as carefree, successful professionals, then with Luke’s arrival in 1987, as doting parents. Tom had a successful career in technology, while Becky was a rising star of the Bay Area ad agency scene. He and Becky wisely managed their earnings and savings, and were able to retire comfortably in their 40s.

In 1995, the family followed their star north, to schools and suburban life in Lake Oswego, OR. There, Tom dove deeply into volunteering and home, and was freed to dedicate more time to community and family, and showering Becky with sweet thoughts and gifts large and small.

Tom is survived by Rebecca A. Holder; daughter Rin Holder; sister and brother-in-law Shirley and Jack Patton; and brothers and sisters-in-law, Rusty and Linda Reichle and Randy and Terry Reichle. Tom was tragically predeceased by beloved son Lucas Holder.

The family is most grateful to the love and care of the Legacy Emanuel trauma ICU staff, and the wonderful palliative team of Emanuel and Hopewell House. A funeral service will be held at 11 a.m. May 18 at Our Lady of the Lake Catholic Church, 650 A Avenue in Lake Oswego.